"If Nigerian hiphop should die before we wake,
we will have only ourselves to blame"
There is a global recession like we all know,people are losing money everywhere and companies are folding up worldwide.it turns out naija hip hop is not immune to the recession.lets look at naija hip hop as a company and in this scenario iam the C.E.O.the only way to save naija hip hop incorporated from going under or folding up as the case may be is to take some drastic measures to counter the problems we are facing.the first step to take is to identify the problems.
The major problem we are facing is that people no longer buy our products(cds & vcds),personally i buy a lot of cds(lead by example) cos i can afford it,really how much is 100 naira,naija music is relatively cheap.but every now and then i think of all the good things i could have done with all the money wasted on buying these cds.some cds are so bad & useless you can't even give them out cos most naija artistes make trashcan music or rara music(listen once,throw it in the dustbin like pure water sachets).if i was offered some naija albums for 20 naira nowadays,i will have to think about it seriously(i just don't want to mention names).
So in view of that,i have decided to do some downsizing & downcutting.iam looking at those who are redundant and are no longer of use to our company.so to all those that will be affected we wish you all the best in your future endeavors.you have all done a great job but right now,our ideas and ideals are no longer aligned.
1.Obiwon-Its been a pretty long time you have done anything meaningful,i hate to be the one to tell you this but "onyinye" was wack and you would have been better off in your former job.take heart,zenith bank is still hiring.YOU ARE FIRED!!!!!!!!!!
2.OJB-What actually happened to you,you had a bright future.you were working in our production department and you even showed flashes of brilliance in our vocal department.like i told you back then you should have given "searching" to tuface(he would have done a better job).making rick ross your new role model shows that you have lost focus.I HEREBY TERMINATE YOUR APPOINTMENT!
3.C-Mion-When was the last time you had a hit?wait let me think.........NEVER.i think that says it all.cameo appearances does not count.YOU ARE FIRED!!!!!!!
4.Soul E-In your own case,you are a bad influence on your peers,you are very unstable.one minute you are an r&b artiste,the next minute you are an evangelist.what is wrong with you?i seriously don't think you have anything to offer this company anymore.YOU ARE FIRED!!!!!!!
5.Big Lo-You were never meant to be here in the first place.i don't really blame you,i blame 2shotz.you are suppossed to be in Alaba,Aba or Onitsha marketing cds or selling whatever it is you know how to sell.i don't want to see you here again.YOU ARE FIRED!!!!!!
6.Marvellous Benjy-It clearly looks like suo has gone the way of galala.initially we thought you had a marketable product(suo) but contrary to our expectations you went from top 10 to not mentioned at all.though you have succeeded in defrauding and decieving us,we have finally caught up with you.YOU ARE FIRED!!!!!!!!!!
7.Dr Sid-You!!!your own case is a special case.we did all we could for you but it all amounted to nothing.you went to da trybe,you were their weakest link(for crying out loud,da trybe is the harvard of naija rap).you are now in mohits where you should be shining like diamonds considering your background but you are struggling for recognition with people like D prince & K switch. instead of bowing out gracefully,you are intent on destroying all the goodwill left by da trybe.when exactly did you become a doctor?you are nothing but a quack,infact you are a criminal(impersonation of the highest order).I HEREBY TERMINATE YOUR APPOINTMENT WITH IMMEDIATE EFFECT!!!!
8.Kenny st Brown-Madam,please sit down & lets talk.due to the relationship we have with your family,we will not be firing you like the others.that is not to say we are pleased with your work ethic.you are always late for work,you are never there when we need you & there has been a lot of complaints/petitions against you(you are not representing gospel artistes very well).did you really make a song with sheyman & da grin?(just curious).to cut a long story short,here is what you need to do for me.take a sheet of paper and write a letter of resignation right now.before you go let me give you a piece of advice,try and get a young gun to take very good care of you and you will be amazed at how soon you will forget about music(i hope you know what i mean).YOUR RESIGNATION LETTER BEFORE WE CLOSE FOR THE DAY!!!!!!
9.Dr Fresh-At this point in time,we have no need for doctors in this company,whether quack or real.the only problem we have with you is that you don't fit the company profile,you are not commited and age is no longer on your side.we are seriously in need of fresh faces.i guess i never told you this before but from my own point of view,you were never an heavy weight champion.YOU ARE F.I.R.E.D
10.Pastor Goody Goody-If you are a pastor,what gospel do you really preach?trick question-when was the last time you had a hit?never.like i said before cameos don't count.YOU ARE FIRED!!!!!
10.5.Mr kool-Mr kool sent in his resignation letter a month ago.he deprived me of the pleasure of saying that wonderful sentence(you are fired).see,i eventually said it.
If your name appears above.its not the end of the world.feel free to go to Ghana(hiplife)congo(soukous & makossa) or go to Sao tome & Principe and make whatever type of music they are making there.you are no longer wanted in Nigeria.thank you very much.
NOTE:if there is someone you feel we have overlooked,please kindly contact the management or call 080-U-ARE-FIRD.